Journal – August
Santosa.Loneliness.Trust
August 4, 2019
Contentment
If we practice contentment, it can bring peace and freedom into our lives. When I practice contentment I face some realities in my life that weren’t planned the way I envisioned and thus trust comes into play. In Patajanli’s Yoga Sutra, he outlines the 8 limbs that make up Yoga. The eight limbs are…(Heart of Yoga, T.K.V. Desikachar)- Yamas Ethical Standards
- Niyamas Self Discipline
- Asana Poses
- Pranayama Breath Control
- Pratyahara Withdrawl
- Dharana Concentration
- Dhyana Mediation
- Samadhi To Bring Together, To Merge
Loneliness
I’ve been raising my boys by myself for the majority of their lives, their father and I divorced 12 years ago and since then it’s been just us. Last week I went on a yoga retreat, my intention for my retreat was to reset, reset from myself burying my energy into my career, why? Because I now know that is what I do when I hide from my emotions and feelings. I’m hiding from loneliness. I’ve been single for 12 years, and within those years I’ve had 3 solid relationships that have taught me more about love then I could have by myself. This loneliness that I’m hiding from is of a different form, it’s more intense – it’s encompassing all of my relationships. My boys are getting older spending more and more time outside of our home, my friendships are turning into acquaintances and my romantic relationship that I desire is not in existence. During my retreat, we were meditating and I could literally feel my heart and aura so full of love and it immediately created this emotion of happiness inside of me. Immediately afterwards I’m reminded of my current situation of my relationships slowly fading away in the distance. So it got me thinking, are they fading away permanently or are they fading away to give me space to feel this loneliness?Trust
Here I was this week, it was the FIRST day of the month FIRST day of the new moon FIRST day being out of the mercury retrograde – it’s a great day! I could feel the intense energy lift that was felt throughout the month of July and it felt great. I didn’t feel my judgments of my thoughts, I didn’t feel weighed down and I felt light and free. But during this last month with this intense energy I reflected on what I want in this life and it came to me – it’s love. No matter how much hard work I put into my day job, my yoga business, the desire for real love is there and I can’t run from it – so I’m not even going to try anymore. This period of loneliness is one that can bring great sadness to my heart because I have a lot of love to give, however if I give it the space that it obviously needs, I’m left with just me and my pure genuine thoughts, that I can’t run from. It’s like the saying that if something in a situation keeps coming up in your life it’s because you aren’t learning from it, so God will continuously keep putting that lesson in your path until you learn the lesson that it’s trying to teach you. With my faith and trust in God and the divine cosmic intervention of our world I know that the connection that I desire will come to me in all my relationships in the form that is right for me, but for right now in this present moment, I will practice santosa and trust.Release
August 11, 2019
The week of the full moon, it’s time to release what’s no longer serving us to get us closer to our intention.
Last week I wrote about being ok with loneliness and the transformation of my current relationships. After I wrote that piece, I felt this sudden shift of transformation in ALL my relationships, it hit me like a ton a bricks. I was down and out for two days trying not to run away from what I was feeling, but at the same time wishing the pain would go away. The pain I felt was pure loneliness – what I thought was loneliness last week was REAL loneliness this week and it wasn’t fun at all.
I was watching my relationships being released right in front of my eyes and there was nothing that I could do, well I could control the situation and make them be in my life, but how would that serve me or them? It wouldn’t, so in reality I knew I needed to come to terms that these selected relationships weren’t serving me anymore and I needed to let go.
Letting go is scary and sad but know that releasing and letting go you are creating space for something better.
Hearing your Inner Voice
I sat and mediated to quiet the mind in order for my inner voice to be heard. My voice was letting me know that these relationships weren’t serving me for different reasons, like dependency, unalignment and not being seen. During my inner voice session I received the reassurance that it was ok that I step away and let go, it was more than ok, it was healthy.
When I’m connected to my inner voice I know the direction I need to go. We can easily let our mind control the direction we go in but how does that serve us? It doesn’t serve us to move forward, it serves us to keep in habitual patterns from our past. What if we let our inner voice speak? We are lead in the direction of what is really serving us and moving us towards our true intention and our true potential in life and this is where true growth occurs.
Taking Advantage of the Full Moon
The FULL MOON, it’s the perfect time to immerse ourselves in the natural shift we feel once a month and use this natural shift to our advantage. The moon moves the water on earth in very magical ways by creating tides in the ocean and since our bodies are made up of 70% water it makes sense that we are moved in magical ways as well (this is not scientifically proven, but if you believe, believe on). The key thing to remember during the full moon cycles is that whatever we are feeling going into the Full Moon will amplify, positive and negative.
With that thought in mind the full moon can release things, people and/or habits that are no longer serving us because that’s our intention moving toward the Full Moon. The technique that I’ve used is to meditate on my inner voice and let the inner voice guide me to what it is that is no longer serving me. Then the night of the Full Moon take what is no longer serving me and write down what I’m releasing during the night of the Full Moon. This month the Full Moon peaks on August 15th at 6:05am (MST), I would recommend writing down what you are releasing either the evening of August 14th or 15th to receive the moon’s full energetic power.
I’ll leave with this quote on letting go and the effects of letting go from my FAVORITE BOOK, “Eat, Pray, Love” by Elizabeth Gilbert.
“If you clear out all that space in your mind that you’re using right now to obsess about this guy, you’ll have a vacuum there, an open spot – a doorway. And guess what the universe will do with the doorway? It will rush in – God will rush in – and fill you with more love than you ever dreamed. So stop using David to block that door. Let it go.”
Morning Routines
August 18, 2019

- Mom
- Employee
- Yoga Teacher
- Business Owner
- Home Owner
- Student
My Morning Routine
The morning routine that I’ve set up for myself has evolved over the years, and today looks like the following:- Wake Up to my alarm no later than 6am everyday (even on the weekends). Prior to going to bed I ensure my phone is placed on ‘Do Not Disturb’, so I can’t be woken up by random emails, text messages or phone calls during my sleep, for the exception of the people in my life that might need me in case of an emergency, like my children. I’ll keep my phone on this setting until my morning routine has been completed.
- Stretch my body to give it some good morning love. Our bodies have been laying down from anywhere between 6-8 hours, by stretching we are getting the blood and energy flowing through our bodies and waking it up.
- Play Music to get my senses up and excited for the day ahead and if I’m feeling pretty dang good and the right song comes on, a dance party might start up 🙂
- Tongue Scraping and Brushing my Teeth to remove the toxins from the day before. This step brings awareness to my body because the toxins that I’m removing is located on my tongue. The toxins on your tongue can give some great insight on how your body is digesting your food, and thus be aware of what foods your body is having a hard or easy time digesting.
- Drink Water to hydrate our bodies. It has been about 6-8 hours since your body has had anything eat or drink, it’s important that the first thing to give it is nice refreshing, clean water. When I drink the first glass of water, I can physically feel the water hydrating my body with each drop.
- Shower. I’ve adopted the practice from Ayurveda called abhyanga (self massage) of massaging my head and body with sunflower oil before my shower. This step in my morning routine is my favorite because it provides great benefits to include:
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- Lustrous Hair
- Soft and Healthy Skin
- Nourishment of my Body
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- Mediation and Journal. This practice is so important because mindfulness is the key to being aware of your surroundings, handling stress and an increase in emotional healthiness. I find that meditating and journaling before I start the day is a great way to reset myself and give my emotions the space they need.
- Podcast Listening while I get ready. Throughout the day I can get so busy that the idea of listening to a podcast is in the far distance. As an alternative, I listen to my favorite podcasts while I get ready. My favorite podcasts include:
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- J. Brown Yoga Talks
- How I Built This with Guy Raz
- Mastering the Business of Yoga
- The Lively Show
- Guru Singh
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